There's a reason why you love someone for so long
This ch 8 show "Mars vs Venus" is so addictive. And i guess the main reason is because it reflects reality.. Reality as in human nature.. Though I dont really think that its possible to find a guy who will never stray. Apart from that, I think it portrays the susceptibility of human nature to temptations.
Especially the story of Tay Ping Hui and Huang Bi Ren. I think, or rather, I am SURE, every single one of us have friends whose bfs/gfs left their partners for a third party, only to realise that it was a mistake.
Just recently, a friend of mine did the same thing. He has been with his gf for 6 years. From uni days, all the way until he started working. His gf wasnt perfect - she's very pampered and sometimes short tempered - but everyone has flaws and he accepted her for that. Until he met a new colleague at his workplace - a seemingly sweet, demure and submissive girl. Basically, his type of girl. And suddenly, his gf's flaws were unacceptable.. flaws he lived with for 6 yrs, he couldnt live with them anymore. So, he dumped his gf to go after this new girl. The only redemning thing he did was he was honest with his gf - he told her tt another girl came into his life. (Although that must have hurt his gf terribly..)
All the 6 yrs, the gf was always there for him - to encourage him during exams.. worry for his results.. supported him thru his down times during work. However he bought his gf nothing - not even a key chain. But for this new girl, he bought her a coach bag even tho he knew her for less than half a yr. If you think he deserves a beating, i agree too. And I slapped him (on his arm la)
Then he start to realise that this new girl does not seem to be what she appears to be. She's evasive.. she doesnt reply sms or calls on weekends.. she claims she's busy. So turns that she apparently wasn't that serious about him. And he regretted. But too bad for him - his gf is really hurt and adamant about not gg back to him (but girls are generally soft hearted creatures). Such guys are really losers - just because they realise the other girl is not the one, they go back to the old one. I mean, they should have known better right? The day they decided to leave their gf for someone else, they should be prepared for the risk that they may end up with nothing. And women should never forgive men for such an unforgiving thing they did - 好马不吃回头草。
Well, in reality the bad guy always wins. She forgave him.. Anyway, i'm happy for my friend. He described his gf as "home cooked food" - that outside food always taste better.. but it will never beat home cooked food that is always healthy, fresh and always there for you after a hard day's work.
I thought a lot about this. And it further re-affirmed my beliefs (which I am almost losing hold of)... that the silliest thing to do is to leave a relationship because of a third party. Not matter how much we think the third party is better.. There's a reason why we love our current bfs/why we are in our current rs, right? And the reason is still always there, a third party only makes u forget the reason. But I think it's perfectly alright to leave a rs when the feelings are not there... maybe because our partners' personalities have changed.. or lifestyle has changed.. or our values have changed.. or even when that person is not suitable.. of course there must not be a third party who made you change.
You must have also heard of many ppl saying that love cannot be measured by the length of time you've known the person, but rather love is a feeling at that point of time. So a budding love can be as strong as an 'old' love, assuming that the person complements you perfectly. For some time, I couldnt quite decide on this debate. But after much thought, I've decided that love, is indeed, measured by time. With time comes memories... the tough times tt a couple went thru.. the happy moments.. the transition and changes of a rs - from ns to uni, from uni to work.. from bus rides to owning a car.. from hawker centres to nice restaurants. all these are testaments of love, which a couple in a budding rs have not experienced. And this is sth that is hard to understand - unless you've been thru it.
And then I realise.. I will never have the heart to leave my bf. There's a reason why I love him for so long. Even if i try to deny that reason, or i try to forget it, the fact is that reason has been and always will be there.
Especially the story of Tay Ping Hui and Huang Bi Ren. I think, or rather, I am SURE, every single one of us have friends whose bfs/gfs left their partners for a third party, only to realise that it was a mistake.
Just recently, a friend of mine did the same thing. He has been with his gf for 6 years. From uni days, all the way until he started working. His gf wasnt perfect - she's very pampered and sometimes short tempered - but everyone has flaws and he accepted her for that. Until he met a new colleague at his workplace - a seemingly sweet, demure and submissive girl. Basically, his type of girl. And suddenly, his gf's flaws were unacceptable.. flaws he lived with for 6 yrs, he couldnt live with them anymore. So, he dumped his gf to go after this new girl. The only redemning thing he did was he was honest with his gf - he told her tt another girl came into his life. (Although that must have hurt his gf terribly..)
All the 6 yrs, the gf was always there for him - to encourage him during exams.. worry for his results.. supported him thru his down times during work. However he bought his gf nothing - not even a key chain. But for this new girl, he bought her a coach bag even tho he knew her for less than half a yr. If you think he deserves a beating, i agree too. And I slapped him (on his arm la)
Then he start to realise that this new girl does not seem to be what she appears to be. She's evasive.. she doesnt reply sms or calls on weekends.. she claims she's busy. So turns that she apparently wasn't that serious about him. And he regretted. But too bad for him - his gf is really hurt and adamant about not gg back to him (but girls are generally soft hearted creatures). Such guys are really losers - just because they realise the other girl is not the one, they go back to the old one. I mean, they should have known better right? The day they decided to leave their gf for someone else, they should be prepared for the risk that they may end up with nothing. And women should never forgive men for such an unforgiving thing they did - 好马不吃回头草。
Well, in reality the bad guy always wins. She forgave him.. Anyway, i'm happy for my friend. He described his gf as "home cooked food" - that outside food always taste better.. but it will never beat home cooked food that is always healthy, fresh and always there for you after a hard day's work.
I thought a lot about this. And it further re-affirmed my beliefs (which I am almost losing hold of)... that the silliest thing to do is to leave a relationship because of a third party. Not matter how much we think the third party is better.. There's a reason why we love our current bfs/why we are in our current rs, right? And the reason is still always there, a third party only makes u forget the reason. But I think it's perfectly alright to leave a rs when the feelings are not there... maybe because our partners' personalities have changed.. or lifestyle has changed.. or our values have changed.. or even when that person is not suitable.. of course there must not be a third party who made you change.
You must have also heard of many ppl saying that love cannot be measured by the length of time you've known the person, but rather love is a feeling at that point of time. So a budding love can be as strong as an 'old' love, assuming that the person complements you perfectly. For some time, I couldnt quite decide on this debate. But after much thought, I've decided that love, is indeed, measured by time. With time comes memories... the tough times tt a couple went thru.. the happy moments.. the transition and changes of a rs - from ns to uni, from uni to work.. from bus rides to owning a car.. from hawker centres to nice restaurants. all these are testaments of love, which a couple in a budding rs have not experienced. And this is sth that is hard to understand - unless you've been thru it.
And then I realise.. I will never have the heart to leave my bf. There's a reason why I love him for so long. Even if i try to deny that reason, or i try to forget it, the fact is that reason has been and always will be there.
posted by Tweety Bird at 8:44 AM
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