Two sides to a coin

There's always two sides to a coin.

Sometimes we think heads is correct. Sometimes we think tails is correct. Irregardless of circumstances, we almost always only think one side is correct.
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Consider these 2 phrases:
1) Out of sight, out of mind
2) Absence makes the heart grow fonder

These two phrases cannot co-exist in your opinion at the same time. According to the situation at hand, you agree with either of the phrase only.
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I'm at career crossroads now.
To take that bold step or not to.
To stretch myself to the max or not to.
To let go of r/s or not to.
To live for myself or not to.
To be selfish or not to.

Tough choice.

Funny garfield comic strip

Photos!

Sunday, 15th April, 2007

@ The Esplanade
@ Suntec, celebrating my birthday!




(click on last pic to see the wrinkles around my eyes)

Regular

Blogging more regularly nowadays!

But frequent blogging more often than not means that I am
1)Lonely
2)Upset
3)Happy

My mind is actually a blank now. But I have nothing to do (actually I hav a lot of things to do, but i don't feel like doing any) so I'll just blog.
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I went to watch Phantom of the Opera with my uni buddies yesterday. Btw, our group has a name - NBS Club 7. Corny/cheesy name that only Miss Mabelline has the imagination to come up with. It was a good play, though better seats wont hurt.. but nonetheless, a good experience. Miss Rs said we ought to be more cultured and watch more of such musicals next time! So we've decided our next one will be dim sum dollies.
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Like what I have also reiterated (did i?), we should live our lives to the fullest, do what we feel like doing, and not let others dictate our lives. But there has always been someone who controls me. Not like a puppet. Mayb somewhat like a kite. When i wanna fly higher, or fly towards the ocean, this person pulls the string. I stop at where I am. I see other kites dipping down the sky, into the ocean. And I thank this person for with-holding me. I feel grateful.

Then I try to fly further again. Again this person pulls me back. Again. Then again. Then again. Suddenly I feel frustrated. I no longer feel grateful. I feel restricted. I am only young once, this is the only time I can soar! But i can't. For the rest of my life, I cant soar. Unless, I break free. But the person will be upset that the kite is gone. And i'll be upset because I am ungrateful.

Still, I want to soar. Still, I do not have the courage to.
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I'm vexed. vexed over sth that alr has a solution - a stark clear solution. sth that I have alr made a decision on. Been years since I felt this way. Eh, in fact, I have never felt this way! But I know, it's gg to be over. very very soon.

Sometimes, I look at people around me. I look at the things that they are troubled abt. And sometimes, just sometimes, I snigger. At them. For being so ridiculous, for not seeing the obvious solution. For letting their silly feelings rule their head.

I've just sniggered at myself.
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Life is not about taking unnecessary risks. Un-calculated risks. People think you're boring for not takng a risk. But i see it the other way round - people who take risks are stupid ppl. uncalculated risks, of course.

I also think life is not about doing things on impluse. I look at ppl who give up everything to pursue a (ridiculous) dream (pursuing dreams are sometimes synonymous to taking uncalculated risks) and when they land hard on their asses, I pity them but at the same time, hey, serve them right. That will teach them a good lesson. Well, at least they learn.

While I never learnt anything.

Birthday

My birthday photos.. courtesy of Cheryl B

Time has passed

I was just looking at my own blog, and the wishlist on the left panel. Suddenly, I realised I have fulfilled all my wishes, of course except the one about not turning 21. Does working really fulfill dreams and wishes? I wonder..

These days so many people are telling me that I don't look my age. That I look 25. And suddenly, I am okay with it. But please dont say I look 26 or beyond. That will b utterly sad. But anw, 25 is fine. Like there's some maturity and some wisdom. 23 year olds may look somewhat lost and not worldy wise. Yeah, suddenly it's so important to me that I look smart and intelligent to others! The only worry I have abt looking 25 is that I will look older than #10. Other than that.. I'm actually quite happy abt it!

I think I've changed. Work has changed me. Work made me realise that there is more to life than just fulfilling my own dreams, many of which are superficial. Work made me realise the importance of making someone else's day. Making someone happy by smiling more, or by saying some kind words, or by going the extra mile for others. All of a sudden, I feel like a kind hearted soul. Esp after i've been so dao and unfriendly for the past 23 years. Work also made me realise that time flies, and that I need to make full use of the time i have. Work also made me realise that it's okay to screw up a few years of my life, to take risks and take the road less travelled. My asset now is my youth and I should make full use of it.

Goodness, why do I sound so old? But seriously, I should do something about my life.

Trying my best

Hi...

I'm still alive, and still as boring as a cow.

Anyway, i'm also trying my best to keep my blog alive.. but somehow, i am always so tired and no time to do anything at all.

My birthday jus passed last week, it was a good one. Had a fabulous time with em, evon, cheryl, mier and grace at mos. My first time there. While queueing up, I was very agitated (for some reason) and then i was ramaging through my bag. And i accidentally flinged out my bra (i brought extra bra, i was wearing one okay) darn embarrassing.

I have such wonderful colleagues.. they bought me a cake and sang me a song. just a very simple gesture but i appreciated it a lot.

This week has been a sad week. cos two of my colleagues are leaving, not leaving the company, but leaving to work in another country. One has already left, the other is leaving on sunday. And they happen to be my buddies. As if this is not bad enough, another bestest buddy of mine is leaving at the end of the month. Why is everyone leaving?!! So sad.

Oh well, I guess life is like that. Nothing i can do...

Okay, that's all.