响叮当，响叮当，响叮当~~

Merry Christmas!

I was at home on xmas eve afternoon, and my dad was listening to the radio. The station was playing this song called "踏雪寻梅". It's an old christmas carol, and seriously, I couldn't stop laughing when i was listening to it. This lady was singing in a really high pitched voice.. trying to search for the song online now, but having difficulty.. Mabel, if you have the resources, please help me find!

This year's Christmas is really busy, busy buying presents, and writing Christmas cards..

Despite so, I couldn't really feel the festive season, as too many ppl around me has fallen sick. The customary Christmas Day Dinner at godma's place won't be happening this year, and this is probably the major factor why I cant feel xmas.

Another reason is probably because I'm working this yr! No time to meet friends... this year is the first time in years I have not met up with emily and evon! Since sec sch, I think we've been meeting up almost every xmas eve, or a few days before tt. This yr, my weekdays are packed with work, evon's gg away to kukup frm xmas eve onwards, and emily is sinking deeply into the sea of love... eh emily, you remember we used to meet up on xmas eve?? now too occupied huh... hahhaha. I'm happy for you lar. =)

Lastly, I shall end with a photo. Nowadays, I like to copy tyw. hahah.

No matter what, Christmas remains an enjoyable holiday... I'm really sleepy now.. Shall slp and hopefully, wake up to a wonderful xmas day! =)

A life full of regrets - or not?

Throughout the 70 years or so of our lives, there're many things that we can do. But more often than not, we end up not doing most of them.

Yesterday before my grandma left, I told her "You must come here more often."

She told me she would love to, but she cant. Her health isn't as good, she will need someone to accompany her out to spore and accompany her back. I felt very sad.

When we were still young, she was very healthy and walked to the market every morning. She came to spore once in a long while to visit us, and when she does so, she still walks to the market with my mom every morning. Although she was healthy and could withstand the long journey from ipoh to spore, she had responsibilities - grandchildren to take care of, grandfather to look after. And because of this, she couldnt come often.

Now that her grandchildren has grown up, my grandfather is no longer around, she is very lonely back at home in ipoh. She wants to come to spore, but who has the time to bring her here? My uncles all need to work, my aunt in spore can drive up to ipoh to fetch her, but that is really exhausting.

I pondered a little, and realised that no matter which stage of our lives we are at, there's always something that we want to do. And there's always a reason to stop us from doing so.

In my teens, i wanted to hire a private tennis coach. But tennis is such an expensive game, I can easily blow a hundred over dollars for jus one lesson. I didnt want to burden my parents with the expenses, hence i gave it up.

Then in JC, I would love to hang out at siglap or parkway with my friends all day long. During the hols, i would love to join my friends in the reading room/library (studying, but laughing n joking more) more, but i didnt. Because I knew my mom didnt really like it, so i don't do it. Thinking back now, I feel like i missed out a lot, and disappointed my friends at times too. Yet if i choose to hang out outside more, I would have disappointed my mom.

Uni days ... Perhaps i should have gone clubbing more often, and experience it.. afterall I have all the freedom that I wanted back then. Now, how to club? Ladies' night seem a thing of the past for me now.. some of my older collegues dont even know its ladies' night on wed, they thought its only mambo night.

Now that I'm working, there're so many things that I want to do. I want to go for dancing lessons, yoga/pillates lessons, gym more often, jog more often. 5 months into my career, I have done almost nothing. ANd i keep telling myself its becase I dont have time, and my knees dont allow me to do so.

Then what am I going to do? Am i just going to continue giving myself excuses? When i grow old, will i live a life full of regrets. Judging by my procrastination skills, I think I'm gg to die a sad person. Despite all the obstacles, i should just get my butt moving and do what I should do.

Easier said than done.. pillates lessons, anyone?

One more week to Christmas!

I'm trying my very best to update my blog as often as i can!!!

Anyway... the rest of the year is going to be a really good time for me cos my boss has gone back to his home country and he wont be back until Jan 6th! How great is tt man... of cos, i have some work to do, but its gonna be a relaxing 3 weeks for me =DDDDD

I jus bought my new phone!! After like 2 years, not very long la cos i usually change phone only when i renew the contract. But i like my 6230 a lot.. its a simple and user friendly phone. new phones are laggy and have lotsa software probs. But what to do, everyone has a 3G phone now, I also want...! So i bought N80! its a nice phone with a THREE megapixle camera, but then hor, its a complicated phone with so many functions.. I hate buying tech products.. hate the learning. But this time round, I vow to learn how to use all (ok at least half) of the functions of the phone!!Cant always rely on others to do these stuffs for me..

I also bought a new IPOD! though this was a month ago.. but nonetheless, an mp3 player has always been what i wanted.. I have 800 songs in it, but after jus one month, i'm sick of the songs le... =(

The only sad thing that happened recently is that my grandma left for m'sia this morning. She's been here for about 2 weeks plus, and I tried my best to spend time with her. But work is taking up quite a bit of my time, and also, after work entertainment related to work. Just this week, i've been to drinking TWO times. Ask me anything about drinking and i can tell you wads nice. ok lar not everything la i'm exaggerating haha. So, this morning when she left, I was really quite upset. But I am glad I held her hand and told her to take good care of her health, because she was really happy to know that i (and my sisters and mom) care. Couldn't help but tear when she left, I'm so afraid i wont see her again.... =(

Before i end.. I want to post a pic... I hardly have a decent pic of myself! (part of the reason why this pic is quite nice is cos only half of my face can be seen...) Thanks to yc's great photography skills and his really cool DSLR!

Conquering Twenty-one Kilometres

I am never going to forget how I felt on the 3rd Dec 2006.

430am: I woke up to the large shrilling sound of the alarm clock. The first word that popped in my mind was "Shit."

445am: I looked around the kitchen for food, but there was none. Cursed myself for not preparing some energy bars/bananas the night before. But I needed to make sure that I don't run on an empty stomach, so I cooked myself some instant noodles. -_-

530pm: I reached Tampines Stadium and boarded the chartered bus to the race destination. So many people were wearing the same singlet as me. it felt weird. Once on the bus, I fell asleep almost immediately..

600pm: Reached the place, everyone was walking around.. doing warms ups blah blah blah. At that time, I wished I were dead. Tried very hard to look for Emily and Cheryl, then went to deposit our bags.

615am: We wrote inspirational notes to pin on our backs. Mine says "You cant be" Emily's say "Slower" Cheryl's says "than us!) I got separated from them . so imgaine how stupid i looked.

620am: We went to the toilet, as usual chit chatting and laughing...

635am: We realised tat we missed the race time, which was 630am. We have not even done any warms ups

645am: The race began for us! We were jogging effortlessly, and even had all the energy to laugh n chat..

730am: After running for 6km, I decided it's time for me to stop. Not going to risk injuring my knees.. So i told emily n cheryl to go ahead without me...

800am: I felt so bored. wanted so much to catch up w my frens, but I had to be rational-my knees are more impt..

830am: Still feeling lonely, I decided to admire my manicured fingers to kill time. And I realised they were swollen! Couldnt even clench my fist properly. At the same time, I saw a woman collaspe and lying by the roadside, waiting for help. Had such a strong urge to go up to the first aider to ask if i will faint from swollen fingers. But i didnt want to appear mad...

850am: An old man overtook me, he was running and READING A BOOK at the same time. The pages of the book was stained with droplets of his sweat already. My eyes nearly popped out.

900am: THe finishing line is just 500m away, but I had to make a loop of 8km or so.. I just wanted to die there and then.

915am: Decided to stop by the roadside to stretch. My muscles were so tight that I dun think my legs could carry me any further... My back, shoulders and every other part of my body were aching and screaming for rest. but i still had 6 kilometres to go

920am: I saw the banana station! Starving, I took a banana to eat.

930am: I saw Emily and Cheryl! THey were on their way back to the finishing line. We were like 2 or 3 km apart.. and there was no way i was gg to catch up w them in the state that I was in. Wished they could wait for me, they offered too, but at the finishing line -_-

940am: I needed to talk to someone BADLY. I'm like conquering something so difficult and yet I had to do it alone... So i started a small talk with this girl beside me. This is also the first time she's running a marathon and her friends were also way in front. Feels so much better to talk to someone and have someone beside me.

1000am: Passed by the same banana station again, and I took one more banana.

1015am: A volunteer by the roadside tried to cheer us on, "Come on, it's only 1km! Run!" Yeah right I would be running if i can. I want to end the agony as early as I can.

1030am: The finishing point... just 500m ahead....

I finally finished the race. Though the loneliest race ever, it is also the most memorable one.

2 years.. and counting..

I jus realised that its been two years since i started blogging. Time really, really flies.

Anw, I haven't been blogging in a long while.. too tired and lazy to.. Right now, my mind is a blank.. I'll think of what I can blog abt first..

Till then...